I was examining about certain weird emotions that I was experiencing lately, wondering about the origins and to accommodate the circumstances, the level of sensitivity that I was using to approach the situations. Then I decided, perhaps the best way to explain certain people, and to over-stereotype - porcupine-personality.

In cognitive developmental psychology, there are apparently three types of infants that develop from different level of attachment to their primary caregiver. One of those types is the ambivalent baby. He/she somehow got used to the caregiver not being there when he/she cries, and not receiving timely hugs and cuddles. So in the 'separation' experiment, when the caregiver and the infant are interacting in a room, the caregiver is asked to leave upon seeing a cue. The ambivalent infant cries a little when the caregiver left, and was less at ease with himself/herself. When the caregiver returned, the infant behaved a little more easy, but refused to approach the caregiver - its as if a self-protective mechanism was in place. Don't get too close, so you won't experience the change in distance when the person leaves - after all, you weren't that close to begin with.

According to this other psychologist who was so ambitious as to start a particular study 30 years ago and only recently completed it, a baby's personality at about 10 months old predicts his/her personality at around 30 years old (at least the timepoint at which they were sampled again in this long cross-sectional study). Apparently the baby who explores lesser, was less brave and happy with changes grew up to be someone who is rather inflexible and unhappy with changes to life.

Over a lifetime of reinforcing certain behavioral traits, enhancing certain subset of your skills, an ambivalent baby can often become a porcupine - thorny on the outside, soft on the inside. They are not emotionally or mentally strong, they are not stubborn and they are not mean and hostile. They appear to be. This facade of strength appears unwavering against rejection, adversity and loneliness. But if you look closely enough, you see that fragility. When you do see it, its hard for you to reject them and leave them lonely again.